Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Silence speaks more than words

Movie theatres like us to believe that silence is golden; when it comes to watching a show that just cost 20 for the tickets and another 30 in snacks I do not think that many people would argue that at least in that case, silence is golden.

It may sound strange to think of silence as an anger management tool, but when used in the right situations it can be a very effective one.

Often times when we are in an argument with someone we are so concerned with getting our point across that we do not even make an attempt to listen to what the other person is saying. After all, there is no way you are wrong- it must be them, right?

Keep those same arguments in mind and try to remember how the ones that had a healthy resolution ended. In some of those cases it is likely that you either realized that you were wrong, the other person figured out they were wrong, or the two of you came to some sort of compromise.

The key element to success in all three scenarios is one thing- silence. Often times your silence can speak and say more than any words that you could say. People often get angry and feel the need to argue because they do not feel as if they are being listened to. Take the time to do just that (and understand what they are saying) and you can go a long way towards finding a solution.

Silence can not only help diffuse the other person's anger, but it can go a long way to quieting yours. Sometimes all you need to do to calm down is stop doing or saying anything. The act of practicing silence can be a calming one simply because you are no longer arguing.

Well, how are you going to resolve an issue if you don't talk it out? While the talking can be a very important tool in conflict resolution and anger management, you first have to be willing to listen to someone else before you can have a chance of resolving even the smallest of issues. That silence shows your willingness to get those issues resolved telling the other person that you are ready to do what it takes to end the argument.

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